Publix Hires Quirky Movie Characters

I dont know what it is, but my current Publix (yes, they belong to me...in the same manner as I belong to my cat) and my previous Publix both have baggers that are clones of movie characters. Specifically, Milton from Office Space and Ray from Rain Man. The old Publix, out on Capital Circle South and Crawfordville Highway is the home of Milton. I kid you not, he looks just like Milton, thick glasses, dim wit and all:



You have NO idea how many times I wanted to give the guy a red stapler...just to see what he'd do.

Ray resides at the new Publix. This kid is probably in his late teens or early twenties and full-on special. He likes to describe to you in detail how he carefully arranges the groceries and bags into the cart. Unfortunately, he bags at an incredibly slow pace. I had over $100 worth of groceries today and the cashier had scanned everything by the time Ray had painstakingly filled the first bag and put it into the cart.

Painstakingly filled the bag wrong.

OK, see, I'm an engineer so I am naturally anal retentive. I put the groceries onto the conveyer belt in the order they should be bagged. Frozen crap goes first - together in a bunch - followed by regular refridgerated stuff, which I don't mind being in the same bag as the frozen stuff. Then come boxed stuff and other small dry goods, then cans, then big non-refridgerated fluids like soda and apple juice then big bulk stuff like paper towels. The frozen stuff should be put in the back of the cart and end with the cans towards the front. The big bulk crap can go underneath. This is so that stuff gets loaded first into the back of the car and the frozen crap gets put in last so it'll be first to be unloaded!

OK, er anyway, so Rain Man's 1st carefully plotted bag has ice cream and canned vegetables in it. Ugh. Neatly arranged and maximizing usage of the bag's volume, don't get me wrong, but still not right.

As I mentioned, the cashier - who happens to be one of this store's better cashiers; always quick, polite and efficient - finishes ringing everything up by the time RayRay has his one prodigal bag put into the cart. This guy clearly loathes Ray and starts bagging up the rest of the groceries filling four bags in less time than it takes Ray to fill his second masterpiece (also wrong).

The best part: the bagger's name really is Ray. I can't make this shit up. I usually check to see who is bagging before I go into a line because of this guy, but my mind was elsewhere and by the time I noticed him there I had already unloaded the cart. Oh well.