Well, it is that time of year again. No, not the Holiday season, the stupid-holiday-product season. Every year as far back as I can remember the TV air waves become inundated with commercials schlepping the most ridiculous crap imaginable. It begins, naturally, right around Black Friday, and persists until a day or two after New Years.
The hope of these TV shucksters, of course, is to take advantage of people who's judgment is impaired by eggnog flavored rum, those too lazy to put thought into gifts, and the stupid. The stupid above all, really. Invariably the commercials for these trinkets attempt to make the products seem like the best thing since sliced bread. In reality, they are usually only marginally better than sliced fingers. Your own sliced fingers. Sliced fingers on your good hand.
The sad thing is that these people will make money. A lot of money. Because there are a lot of stupid people on this planet. The crapola they sell is grossly overpriced for what it is. But even if they were only breaking even on the product, they've built in profit by charging your retarded ass $8 shipping and handling for something that only costs them maybe $2 to ship....and handle, whatever that means.
So, I thought I would chronicle the crap that I see this year and today I will start with Twin Draft Guard. OMG!!! WEATHER STRIPPING!!! ORGASM!!!!
This piece of shit is essentially a towel rolled up from two ends and slid under a door or window. It costs $19 + $8 shipping. Of course, the obligatory 'if you order right now we'll double the number of' spiel is there, so you get two of these glorified rolled up towels for that price. And, yeah, they also throw in the obligatory bonus 'free' unrelated product. In this case an 'over the door hanger'. They somehow come up with a value of $30 for this particular add-on. What a great deal! Three pieces of junk for a mere $27!
Wait a second. I can get 17 feet of good quality weather stripping at Lowes for $6. That's enough to seal the bottom of several doors. Even better, I can use it to seal the sides and top of the door as well, since air doesn't only come in from the bottom. The amazing Twin Draft Guard? Yeah it can only seal the bottom. And the weather stripping is permanently affixed to the door or window, so there is no chance of it coming flying out from underneath the door when you open it quickly. TDG isn't affixed, it is just slid under the door. A loose seal and physics will guarantee that you'll be re-setting it every time you open the door. Fun!
And a quick look at Lowes also turns up a comparable over the door hanger to the one in the commercial for a whopping $10. What?! Surely it has to be worth three times as much! The commercial says so! Right.
So going with Lowes and barely shopping, I have spent $16, compared to the $27 I would have spent on TDG had I been born without a brain. And I got more product and a better functioning product. Common sense for the win!
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